We are gearing up for a full moon during mercury retrograde...it is a time where emotions are flying high and we feel quite a bit out of sorts. We may be feeling like we are dangling in life by ourselves and it scares the heck out of us. We can be feeling like the emotions are bursting out of us and we have zero control.
This may be true for many of us...it was certainly true for me this past Thursday. I have been feeling a lone in my marriage; I felt everything is on me and I was ready to burst myself. I let my emotions get the best of me is an understatement.
I am always trying to do something out of the box for my family to live an extraordinary life; as well as deal with all the health issues that are hitting me left and right. Sometimes I feel I am never getting anywhere, no one understands me along with being a burden. These emotions can and will and do wreak havoc on someone who feels they are at the end of their rope.
This is how it has been me for the past few weeks...I have tried to ignore it, pretend I am upbeat and positive along with stuffing my emotions. Well, Thursday was the day that all hell broke loose. I woke that morning with a phone call at 8 am telling me what I needed to do in my neighborhood...well I was not up at 8 am and my caller gave me the sense of I am lazy if I am not up yet ready to take her call. The downhill spiraling out of control day only got worse; every time I went to do what I needed I was pulled in directions that was taking the time I needed for the day...I could see the time ticking away like crazy and I could not do anything about it. By the time I got back on track time was up...my radio show guest was going to be at my office within 1.5 hrs...My husband came home in the midst of my meltdown and I truly stuck my foot in to the Emotional OUTBURST.
My husband had to leave for about 30 minutes...I was doing my Facebook Live trying two different modalities...when I thought I was off the air I had a phone call...I said some pretty crazy things about my relationship and was looking to find my own space. My guest quickly called and said YOU ARE STILL LIVE!!!! I was beside myself...not only that...My husband was home and heard the whole thing. I never heard him come home. Can you imagine?
As a coach I keep myself at a high standard; sometimes to high that I can't even reach. I broke my husband's heart, but he heard me for the very first time of how I truly felt and something has to give.
For us that emotional Cluster ***k was exactly what we needed. We were able to hash it out right then in there...we had no choice...I could not take back what I said...everyone heard it.
While we are going through this time and emotions are running high...Please take care of yourselves...take deep breathes...get the communication out that you need in a productive way. When you hurt someone with your words it's hard to heal.
I share my story with you because I am not alone. There are many of us out there feeling the same way; use my actions to prevent any drama or hurts that you may cause.
Have an amazing day my friends....until we meet again.
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